Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
