Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Randomize
