Texts From Last Night

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  (586): View more from Michigan

  You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot

  (586): View more from Michigan

  That was very cool/italian of you

  (586): View more from Michigan

  Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving

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  (586): You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot (586): That was very cool/italian of you (586): Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving http://tfl.nu/l4rm
  Replies (11) Good night (1688) Bad night (645)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference

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  (847): Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference http://tfl.nu/ny65
  Replies (4) Good night (1318) Bad night (763) Order T-Shirt
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  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now

  (1-484): View more from Pennsylvania

  sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?

  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  :)

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  (484): sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now (1-484): sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up? (484): :) http://tfl.nu/8r3p
  Replies (12) Good night (3703) Bad night (485)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.

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  (732): You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up. http://tfl.nu/jzsw
  Replies (8) Good night (611) Bad night (2986) Order T-Shirt
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  (641): View more from Iowa

  i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..

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  (641): i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door.. http://tfl.nu/c547
  Replies (20) Good night (572) Bad night (4257) Order T-Shirt
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  (804): View more from Virginia

  This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public

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  (804): This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public http://tfl.nu/6cpw
  Replies (15) Good night (712) Bad night (3559) Order T-Shirt
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  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life

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  (267): while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life http://tfl.nu/pj1v
  Replies (16) Good night (7559) Bad night (676) Order T-Shirt
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  (310): View more from California

  Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on

  (1-310): View more from California

  I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his

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  (310): Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on (1-310): I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his http://tfl.nu/vdif
  Replies (30) Good night (5402) Bad night (726)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...

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  (513): I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten... http://tfl.nu/iblb
  Replies (50) Good night (3073) Bad night (5634) Order T-Shirt
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  (763): View more from Minnesota

  Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue

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  (763): Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue http://tfl.nu/sfb5
  Replies (4) Good night (3422) Bad night (737) Order T-Shirt
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  (206): View more from Washington

  I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.

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  (206): I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve. http://tfl.nu/axt4
  Replies (1) Good night (2083) Bad night (667) Order T-Shirt
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence

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  (770): Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence http://tfl.nu/sug8
  Replies (15) Good night (2776) Bad night (803) Order T-Shirt
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.

  (1-770): View more from Georgia

  You're a good friend.

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  (770): I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that. (1-770): You're a good friend. http://tfl.nu/ln0z
  Replies (2) Good night (1073) Bad night (220)
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  (515): View more from Iowa

  i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars

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  (515): i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars http://tfl.nu/h89f
  Replies (5) Good night (482) Bad night (193) Order T-Shirt
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  (512): View more from Texas

  I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...

  (512): View more from Texas

  Cross faded me is not the classiest.

  (817): View more from Texas

  No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that

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  (512): I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed... (512): Cross faded me is not the classiest. (817): No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that http://tfl.nu/rzqz
  Replies (1) Good night (303) Bad night (184)

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