Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
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