its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Randomize