omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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