She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
