Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
I'm going to CVS to meet the Craigslist guy who is going to buy my underwear. If I don't text you within the next hour, plz assume that I have been abducted by a stranger with an underwear fetish.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Randomize