U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
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