so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Randomize
