If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
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