this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
