someone get that fucking seahorse.
now i know why i became what i already was.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
