I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
Randomize
