First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Randomize
