Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  my room smells like sperm. sweet.

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  (714): my room smells like sperm. sweet. http://tfl.nu/th94
  Replies (14) Good night (1092) Bad night (2649)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!

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  (248): I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there! http://tfl.nu/8urv
  Replies (14) Good night (2602) Bad night (3671)
• Favorite

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life

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  (860): I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life http://tfl.nu/l4zk
  Replies (37) Good night (6223) Bad night (1423)
• Favorite

  (308): View more from Nebraska

  Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.

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  (308): Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning. http://tfl.nu/konb
  Replies (8) Good night (3573) Bad night (1030)
• Favorite

  (316): View more from Kansas

  Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first

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  (316): Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first http://tfl.nu/7abn
  Replies (6) Good night (1618) Bad night (989)
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.

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  (651): Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor. http://tfl.nu/v2bs
  Replies (7) Good night (1718) Bad night (845)
• Favorite

  (805): View more from California

  She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.

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  (805): She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds. http://tfl.nu/ggeo
  Replies (4) Good night (1637) Bad night (673)
• Favorite

  (281): View more from Texas

  I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts

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  (281): I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts http://tfl.nu/b2dg
  Replies (1) Good night (976) Bad night (839)
• Favorite

  (917): View more from New York City

  It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.

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  (917): It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left. http://tfl.nu/g605
  Replies (5) Good night (926) Bad night (934)
• Favorite

  (586): View more from Michigan

  I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.

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  (586): I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science. http://tfl.nu/0s8c
  Replies (6) Good night (1520) Bad night (751)
• Favorite

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.

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  (860): Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night. http://tfl.nu/jb56
  Replies (2) Good night (864) Bad night (318)
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk

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  (315): Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk http://tfl.nu/g5v5
  Replies (1) Good night (937) Bad night (415)
• Favorite

  (817): View more from Texas

  Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.

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  (817): Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks. http://tfl.nu/jci6
  Replies (3) Good night (331) Bad night (561)
• Favorite

  (586): View more from Michigan

  I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."

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  (586): I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone." http://tfl.nu/272w
  Replies (2) Good night (608) Bad night (418)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.

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  (512): I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer. http://tfl.nu/7huv
  Replies (3) Good night (295) Bad night (715)

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