If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I'm like, not good at living.
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Randomize
