Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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