Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
Who did Billy Mays play for?
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
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