why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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