and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Randomize
