hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize
