I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
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