Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
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