I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
