Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
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