how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
16 Sexual Experiences EVERYONE Should Have At Least Once
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...