he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize