Woke up this morning to a janitor hitting me in the head with his bucket in the hallway of my building. An alumni was next to me because we locked ourselves out of my room and couldn't figure out where my roommates were.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
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