Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
Randomize
