Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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