You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Randomize
