My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
false alarm. still invincible.
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
