I've blown a few things in my day
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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