Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Randomize
