It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
I just had sex on a roof
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
