I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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