remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
