I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
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