can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
