If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
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