She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
I met the friendliest cop last night
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
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