We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
