No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
Went to the doctors. She saw my " I love beer" tattoo. All she said was " My drunken tat is of just one word. "Cornnuts.". Then said Mexico was "awesome." And sent me on my way. Yeah. She's my favorite doctor.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Randomize