Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize
