O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize
