U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
Randomize
