please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
