HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Randomize
