I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
im six kinds of drunk right now
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Randomize
