Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
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